Do you have a specific problem you’ve been working on, but don’t have a solution for, yet? Are you stuck just trying to figure out how or where to get started? Is there something on your “back-burner” that’s been there for a while, and you’re not sure how to address it? In Coaching, we help people who have become “stuck” at a certain point in their lives, whether by a problem, a situation, or a thought pattern (to name a few examples). We help you clear the channels, and become un-stuck, so that you are able to move forward into progress and success.
There are many tools available to help you do this….but what I like to look at most is the “Thru-Line.” I developed this technique and have been using it long before I started coaching. It’s a way to objectively, and intelligently, look at a situation, assess where you are, and move forward into action. Here’s an example:
A client recently asked me about changing jobs (careers) and/or her location. I said, “There are two ways to look at this: 1) what do you want to do, and 2) where do you want to do it?…..which one, for you, is more important?” In the end, the location seems to be the driving force behind her upcoming decision. She knows enough to know she just doesn’t want to be where she is anymore. But she doesn’t know enough to know where she wants to go. Enter the “thru-line.”
To figure out the answers to big, life-changing questions like these, some coaches use a magic wand technique, and I do, too. It’s often helpful. But if you’re stuck in not knowing….being given a magic wand to conjure up whatever you want isn’t necessarily helpful. Instead, it’s helpful to look at the lowest common denominators of what you DO want. Back to our example…
My client said, “I don’t know where I want to go – I just know that I don’t want it to be like it is here.” Ok. That’s enough to get started. My suggestion was that she list 10 places where she thinks she’d like to live. I didn’t ask her to analyze why, or how – but rather, I asked her to organically and spontaneously think about 10 places where she might want to live, and then write them down. Being spontaneous is key. From there, we can apply the “thru-line” by looking for the patterns among the locations. Are they all near water? Are they secondary cities? Are they suburbs? Are they college towns? What are the patterns associated with her list? What is the “thru-line?”
When we spontaneously do something, without analysis or introspection, we allow for the opportunity for our intuition to have a voice. It might show up in only 4 or 5 of the 10 locations she’s writing about, but it will show up. It’s when we allow our minds to get too involved that we start to overshadow our intuition. Then nothing becomes clear, and all the information is inauthentic.
My client’s next concern was that her list would be “reactionary.” She was afraid that she would think of 10 places that were the opposite of where she currently was, and that in being reactionary she was being inauthentic and dishonest with herself. My response? I suggested that at this point in her life, moving somewhere different is a reaction to where she is – so why wouldn’t all of the 10 places be the opposite of that? And furthermore, what’s wrong with that? As long as we are being authentic with ourselves in the present moment – there’s no false step to be made. Of course the 10 locations would be different than her current situation – that’s logical. She’s not happy where she is – so wanting something different is the natural choice. And, here’s the best part….if you move once, you can move again. Five years from now, or 10 years from now – she may no longer want to be in this new place either. Or she may want to live there for the rest of her life. Nobody knows. All we have to work with is right now. And all our best decisions can be made from that place.
So, what’s the result? When we apply the “thru-line” to any situation, and we do so honestly and spontaneously, we find that our intuition (our inner wisdom) has the chance to be heard. Patterns develop for a reason, and for those of us who have trouble hearing that inner voice, sometimes going about it in a different way can achieve exactly the same results. By approaching a situation or problem with this kind of technique, you allow for the possibility of change. Once the possibility is given space, change and growth are inevitable.
The next time you have a problem you’re facing – even if it’s as simple as picking an outfit for an interview, or painting a room – apply the “thru-line” technique. It will always point you in the direction of your intuition and your own inner wisdom. Once you’re in touch with that, you will feel more empowered and less “stuck.” From there on out – it’s your choice whether to do something about it and take action, or to accept the status quo. There’s always a choice….but that’s a topic for another day.
In love and light,